You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize