So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
Randomize
