mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize