They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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