I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
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