i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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