i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
Randomize