Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
