So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
