Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
