is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
