I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I asked the cop if I could see his dick- It's not like he could arrest me twice.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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