omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Randomize
