WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Randomize
