I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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