Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me