Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
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