found an unmarked box of photos in the garage, they were from when my parents first got together. It was fun laughing at their ridiculous eighties outfits and hairstyles, until I found a pic of my dad. naked. with a boner.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
