So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
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obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
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We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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