Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
