She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Houston, we have a squirter
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
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