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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
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