Kiss
Puke
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize