you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
Randomize
