Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
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