Yo dont text me then not text me
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
