They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
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