fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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