I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
