Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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