Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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