are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I force fed him french fries and then proceeded to tell him how sexy corgi’s are … it’s safe to say he’s not texting me for a second date.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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