I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize