What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
It's shark week go big or go home
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
