what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize