thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
there was a trapeze. enough said
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
You were wearing a sequin mini, with Tevas. And you still got laid.
Randomize
