have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
