The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize