Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(972): View more from Texas

She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.

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(972): She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur. http://tfl.nu/j1y3

Replies (4) Good night (831) Bad night (489)
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(516): View more from New York

I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...

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(516): I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero... http://tfl.nu/d5tx

Replies (24) Good night (5633) Bad night (657)
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(209): View more from California

i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you

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(209): i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you http://tfl.nu/qjob

Replies (4) Good night (1053) Bad night (3692)
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(225): View more from Louisiana

at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me

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(225): at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me http://tfl.nu/xox1

Replies (23) Good night (757) Bad night (5969)
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(772): View more from Florida

remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.

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(772): remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night. http://tfl.nu/s4kw

Replies (11) Good night (3492) Bad night (1223)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker

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(617): I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker http://tfl.nu/yzaq

Replies (25) Good night (6431) Bad night (923)
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(501): View more from Arkansas

Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.

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(501): Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure. http://tfl.nu/9bef

Replies (7) Good night (1023) Bad night (4331)
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(773): View more from Illinois

Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach

(630): View more from Illinois

Me toooooo!! Margaritas

(773): View more from Illinois

I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good

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(773): Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach (630): Me toooooo!! Margaritas (773): I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good http://tfl.nu/3y14

Replies (53) Good night (1273) Bad night (3797)
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(949): View more from California

Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.

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(949): Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless. http://tfl.nu/j4zx

Replies (4) Good night (2191) Bad night (547)
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(708): View more from Illinois

They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters

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(708): They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters http://tfl.nu/nwd9

Replies (2) Good night (1096) Bad night (671)
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.

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(717): i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me. http://tfl.nu/i878

Replies (7) Good night (1271) Bad night (706)
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(616): View more from Michigan

If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out

(417): View more from Missouri

You'd think the first few times would have been enough

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(616): If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out (417): You'd think the first few times would have been enough http://tfl.nu/z7d7

Replies (10) Good night (607) Bad night (1435)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.

(1-617): View more from Massachusetts

you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight

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(617): You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33. (1-617): you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight http://tfl.nu/rpjk

Replies (5) Good night (2062) Bad night (457)
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(+61): View more from Australia

No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.

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(+61): No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender. http://tfl.nu/14lt

Replies (1) Good night (368) Bad night (333)
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(617): View more from Massachusetts

This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal

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(617): This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal http://tfl.nu/045y

Replies (1) Good night (645) Bad night (192)

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