THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
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