508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
Randomize
