she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I just sucked dick on a ferry
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
Randomize