It was confusing and full of hummus
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
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For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
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candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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