I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Sunburnt clitoris. How do I deal with it.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Randomize
