i just wanna soil my oats bro
it was like his penis was on wheels.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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