Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
