thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
