I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize