What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
