Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
