He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
