just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
birth control should be required to get into college
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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